Grief, International Pregnancy and Infant Loss: the Genesis Breath

Wave of Light

Over the last few years, I’ve been fortunate enough to live close to the water. We see it daily. The beach, my sacred place. To look out at the horizon, watch the setting and rising sun, see the waves as they roll in, it’s mesmerising.

When I was a little girl, my dad told me that waves always come in sets of seven. He said you could count them and after the first big wave crashed, six more would follow, each losing a little power until there was a pause, stillness… Continue reading

Abortion. Choosing to allow a life to be ripped from your body in such a humiliating way is not something your soul moves on from quickly. [Personal experience]

The first time I walked through the door of the abortion clinic was for an appointment to confirm I was pregnant. In my mind, there was no need for confirmation. Since I’d taken the test, the subtle changes in my body were haunting reminders of the secret I was hiding. A sudden thirst for soft drink, cravings for ice cream and a distaste for coffee, which had generally sustained me each day during university and long hours at work.

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Sin too deep for forgiveness…

how to feel forgiven

The shame, guilt and horror of what I’d done were so deep that I couldn’t deal with being present in my own life. I just watched it from a distance. I wasn’t me. At times, truckloads of emotions boiled up, and I exploded in uncontrollable crying, screaming and shouting. The outbursts lasted for hours. I was an intelligent and capable young woman yet the way I was living was incongruent with what my heart knew to be true, and it caused extreme conflict within. Continue reading

An Excerpt from Daughter Wait

Daughter Wait Carly

Chapter 3: Wisdom From Above

Sit down and grab a coffee- you’ll love this chapter from my soon to be released book Daughter Wait! 

As I sat on the bed of my small dorm one afternoon, I opened my Bible to find Solomon moaning that life felt meaningless. Hardly uplifting, but this verse caught my eye: ‘The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil’ (Ecc 9:9 NLT).

I was intrigued. The idea of becoming a wife one day seemed impossible after the series of less than ideal choices I had made. It was the furthest thing from my mind…kinda. Continue reading