Just wanted to take the time to check in with you and see how you’re doing. So… hi! How are you? Holding up?
I think the reality of everything has settled in for me. I knew, logically, this was going to be months not weeks, but I guess it felt so “new” when it started. I lost a lot of steam and I’ve just been trying to give myself grace to not be my best. To not get a lot done even if I have a full day ahead of me. To skip workouts if I’m not feeling it. To choose reality TV over books. One of the things that helps me the most is to embrace what I’m feeling in the moment– if I’m sad, I’m sad and if I’m good, I’m good.
Thought I’d do a few light updates just for fun.
Here I am bundled up trying to get some good outdoor time in. It was so windy and cold but sunny so I made it happen with a puffer coat (on sale) and blanket (great small business!) PS Our new chairs (on sale!) came in about 48 hours– I was shocked!
INVISILIGN
Right before things got crazy, I started Invisalign. I was having this tooth issue and I panicked thinking I had gum disease. My other theory was that it was my permanent retainer which hadn’t felt right for a few months. But after a trip to the dentist, it was clear that it was, in fact, the retainer. So off it came. The orthodontist talked me into Invisalign. It wasn’t as expensive as I thought it was going to be and it wasn’t going to take as long as I thought either. I agreed, they popped the retainer out (it came out shockingly easily), and I immediately started the Invisalign trays. The first week was the worst. My teeth hurt so much. It was so uncomfortable that I regretted it and considered quitting. I’m switching my trays every Monday night so I was bracing myself for the second week’s tray thinking it would hurt as bad as the first set. Nope. It’s slightly uncomfortable but doesn’t hurt nearly to the degree as the first tray. I’m only four weeks in and I have already noticed a difference. Feeling good!
The biggest downside, besides the first week, is that my lips are ridiculously dry. Apparently it’s a common “side effect” of Invisalign. If that’s the worst of it though? Totally manageable.
WORK
Work has been… weird. I’m definitely grateful for the position I’m in all things considered. But it can be really hard to be your own boss at a time like this. (There are moments where I’m, like, I wish I had someone to just tell me what to do!) I’m trying my very best to do good. To put out content that is light but still appropriate for the climate the world is in right now.
My actual workload is about a fifth of what it usually is, which feels weird. I keep thinking I’m forgetting to do something or be somewhere. It’s a shift and I’m adjusting to it, even though some days are harder than others.
ZOOMS & VIRTUAL HANGOUTS
I’ve been turning down Zoom calls and virtual hangouts. I love the idea and sometimes it’s exactly what I need. Other times I just don’t feel like I can turn myself “on” for them. I read somewhere that was basically like even though you have an empty evening calendar, you can still opt of a hangout. And the best piece of advice I’ve found is to schedule an end time!!!! I’m still an introvert and I hate that awkward moment of being drained at the end of a call but not having anywhere to go. There’s no social cue for the end (like a waiter dropping the check off at your table) and no real obligation to go to next. So I’ve been doing the “Want to do a 30 minute Facetime at 5?” or “How about we do a Zoom from 6-7?” Maybe I sound like a loser but whatever. Virtual socializing is still socializing.
QUARANTINING WITH A PARTNER
Mike and I have been enjoying our time together, a lot. I was worried that we’d be losing our minds, particularly me because I really like my alone time (like silent/alone/please don’t talk to me at all time). But we have settled into a nice routine for Monday-Friday and then have a weekend routine, too. We both take time apart (grateful for this house), but we’re not driving each other insane whatsoever. Not that every moment is perfect– but we’re both giving each grace and recognize that these are not normal times and it’s okay if you’re not 100% yourself in a given moment. Mike and I are so very clearly on the same page for how we’re quarantining– it’s not even a conversation, we just both agree on what is right.
I will say I’ve been talking to various friends and one thing is clear… there are pros and cons to different kinds of living situations at the moment. There are times I’m sad we don’t have kids and times I’m relieved we don’t. Times when I’m super glad to be with my partner and other times when I just want to be in the house by myself. There are times when I would love to be in Florida with my family and times when I know I would probably lose my mind.
HOBBIES
I kind of envisioned myself being super into organizing every bit of the house and I’m not even remotely interested. I did a couple of small things, like clean my car, and I’m cleaning the house and doing laundry. But organizing? Have zero desire. Which, whatever. I usually start to switch my closet over from cold weather to warm weather around this time and I have absolutely no interest in doing that.
I have been loving my needlepoint more and sewing the masks last week really inspired me to do more sewing projects. I talked about hobbies a couple of months ago and I stand by that. I’m not doing it to be productive (well the masks were) or to kick up some side hustle. I’m just doing it because I enjoy it, because it keeps my hands busy and eyes off screens, because it’s a nice mental distraction.
“SURE. WHY NOT?”
This has become my motto right now. I’ve been saying it left and right. Sleeping in? Sure, why not. Baking cookies before noon? Sure, why not. Sitting in my car in the driveway just to be in my own space for twenty minutes? Sure, why not. Ordering another pair of pajamas? Sure, why not. We’ve been saying that anything goes pretty much.
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Great post. We are doing ok. I think it’s all a frame of mind. Having a 1 year old has its ups and downs (especially while working from home) but I ultimately feel like she has kept us smiling, moving forward, laughing at random things, and on a schedule!!! I really thought I’d miss going to stores and running errands but I really don’t, yet. It’s actually kind of nice to not be in the rat race. I recharge with alone time.. i wasn’t doing it enough the first couple weeks. Now, I head up to my quiet third floor guest room and cross stitch and read!!
Am ok. Hubs and I are here with 2 pups. (love them All). He working from home. Cannot see Grandkids-Son in Hospital as an MD… praying lots he ( other staff remain healthy). Doing lots of knitting, walking pups, workout video — cleaning and cooking. Miss my parents so much out west. Hard to not be able to visit them. Take care! ( our 2 pups are getting used to my sad attempts to groom and clip and trim them). They give me such comfort!
I appreciate this check in. I live alone, which normally I love. Right now though living alone is hard. I am very fortunate to be on paid leave from the library I work at, but living alone and not having work or the chance to see people I love in person has really taken its toll. Prior to this I already struggled with mental health, and now I find my mental health has worsened to the point where I need extra support from my treatment team. I can also relate to having no interest in being hyper productive/ organized. I feel like making it to the end of the day counts as a major victory. Sorry my update is such a bummer. I hope you continue to find and do what works for you to get through this difficult time.
Hey Abbey – no apologies needed. Thanks for speaking the truth about your situation. I’m so sorry you are alone, especially with no work to do. Working from home is the only normal thing I have right now, and I’m still struggling. I’m so glad you have your treatment team to support you. Sending you love
Great post! I’m having much the same experience. No organizing. No working out. No reading. I watch tv, listen to audiobooks whole cooking/washing dishes, cross stitch, clean, laundry, decorate snail mail envelopes. And work 8-4:30. My husband is a pharmacist so we try some semblance of social distancing. We haven’t done as good a job as we should. I’ve been a bit snappy bc I think he should put his dirty clothes away (not on a kitchen chair or couch) and shower when he gets home – he won’t. Even though we are well, we are still healing from a sort of trauma and reality tv, eating, and cross stitch are good coping strategies. Folks, it’s important not to reach for alcohol during times like these.
I try to watch the news to stay informed, but the news honestly makes me so anxious so it’s hard to find the right balance. I’ve been using this time, as most of my friends, to clean my house, go through my clothes, trying a bunch of new workouts, and reading a LOT. I’m just hoping this will all end soon because I really hate being out of work!
Thanks for checking in! I love this line from your post! I really like my alone time (like silent/alone/please don’t talk to me at all time), I am like this too but am doing well which kind surprises me. Also, I have not been into organizing at all! Maybe when we get a deadline as to when it will be over I will jump into action. Until then I am really having fun working on the Ancestry book I told you about. Take care and I think having little ones around would be SO HARD! They are such a joy for sure but my heart goes out to the Mommies trying to keep them busy.
Thank you so much for all of your posts, they are always so great to read everyday, especially during this time! I really enjoyed this real life update. Stay well! 🙂
Hi Carly—I’m glad you’re hanging in there! It’s hard for sure, but your posts have been so fun for me each day and I appreciate them!
I’m a music teacher so this elearning is a brand new curve for all of us. We haven’t even had spring break yet! It starts Wednesday, but I’m glad that I’ve been able to provide fun for my kiddos from my living room (and have definitely been getting some influencer tips on how to talk to a camera! All of my content is video!). I’ve been knitting and running a lot to stay sane and I’ve been loving baking and cooking. It’s definitely hard not to see my family or be able to pet the family dog, but I know that this is just a season, even if it’s longer than we thought originally. I’m inspired to try needlepoint and might get a canvas for my spring break project!
Hey Carly, thanks for being so honest with how you have been handling the last few weeks. It makes my own emotional roller coaster feel a bit more normal! I’ve just tried to focus on a few very small things each day (drink 8 glasses of water, go for a walk, etc) and accomplishing those makes me feel good. It’s hard when I feel like all my plans for the next few months are most likely cancelled and there isn’t a ton to look forward to.
Thanks so much for sharing this! I agree with a lot of what you said. One thing that has been really eye opening for me is that I didn’t have any real hobbies before quarantine. I read a lot but other than that it was all hobbies that had turned into my job.
So I have used this as a great reason to get a few hobbies including needlepoint, at home manicures (idk if this is a hobby but I’m getting really good at it), baking, and I’m sure more will come.
It’s just nice to have something to do with no real productivity tied to it.
Hi! Similar to everyone else – we (husband, pup, & 2-year-old) are doing OK. I work in media so it has been extremely taxing to be on the news constantly monitoring what’s going then add in a toddler who knows no boundaries and well you’ve got me.
The silver lining is that my husband and I have really enjoyed this time together and hope to figure something out in the future where we can work together more.
Watched way too much news initially and it really took its toll. Have been feeling ‘off’ physically but not sure if a mild case or stress from inactivity, sheltering at home and worry. Starting a needlepoint project and reading….am so over cooking and I love to cook. Hub and I are doing ok together, he is type A and not going to the gym was an adjustment for him but he put a new routine in place.
Feeling much the same so thank you for sharing. Don’t feel like organizing or major projects, wish I did. Watched way too much news initially and it really took its toll. Have been feeling ‘off’ physically but not sure if a mild case or stress from inactivity, sheltering at home and worry. Starting a needlepoint project and reading….am so over cooking and I love to cook. Hub and I are doing ok together, he is type A and not going to the gym was an adjustment for him but he put a new routine in place. But missing and worrying about fam, daughter moved to Florida in January. Thanks again for sharing reality, so sick of all the false Facebook type positivity or tasteless jokes.
Global pandemic + anxiety disorder is definitely a recipe for disaster, but we’re managing. I previously lived by myself but my younger brother moved in with me which, while annoying at times, has been nice to just have another person. Since I still have online school and studying for the MCAT it’s been really really hard to allow myself not to be productive everyday? So I’ve been trying to do yoga every day, bake or cook something fun (like homemade bagels!) or do a face mask and watch a movie and allow myself not to be productive. Glad you all are managing and are finding small things to enjoy!
I get that, Cecelia! Currently my Step 1 date has moved three times and I have found it a challenge to switch from a very intense six week study plan with the excitement of third year at the other end (after a vacation to celebrate too) to a twelve week marathon. My advice is to set aside study time and block everything else out. Nobody can relate to studying for a huge exam in the midst of this besides people doing it, not even as our friends and family work from home. It’s just not the same. But I try to find the positives in what I’m studying and make goals for the day. Good luck studying and fingers crossed you can take the MCAT when you plan to!
Hi Devon! I’m studying for Step 1 too, and I agree, it’s totally not the same. Now with more time to study, I’ve definitely been struggling with how to adjust my study plan such that I’m still studying intensely, but not becoming completely burned out! It’s frustrating that we don’t have the luxury of being less productive right now–constantly reminding myself that everyone is in a unique situation and one isn’t right or wrong. Here’s to hoping we can take our exams soon enough and start third year!!
Will you do a fixed retainer again, after you’re done Invisalign? I’m about to finish with invisialign (supposed to be done in May, but I’m sure that will be pushed back with Covid-19) & plan on doing a fixed retainer on my bottom teeth. I’ve never known anyone else to have issues with theirs, but your story makes me a little nervous. Was it lack of check-ups? I know you’ve mentioned you didn’t do regular dentist check ups.
Hi Ashley! I had the same issue with my permanent retainers… one broke and I replaced with a removable retainer and then the other (top teeth) had a coiled wire that started uncoiling and moving my teeth! Luckily I noticed and had it taken out before too much damage was done, but I would highly recommend not taking the risk of permanent retainers, my dentist said she does not recommend them anymore either!
Carly, thank you for the post. Its genuine and raw for this time.I appreciate your posts each day, and I know its hard to write right now. But having the normalcy of looking forward to your posts each day is a light. I’m doing well, an essential healthcare worker, so life is fairly normal, minus the social obligations. I think looking forward to knowing the sun will come up each day is the biggest thing giving me hope, and knowing we are one more day closer to this being over. I hope to look back on this time and treasure the slower pace and forget about the fear that ebs in constantly. So thank you for continuing to show up. The internet needs this little corner. 🙂
Hi Carly! Thank you so much for your post. Your blog and Instagram are something I look forward to every day. I hope you know what a positive, refreshing, and authentic impact you have on your readers. I am holding up okay. I am grateful to be at home, doing yoga, & social distancing. I am a college senior and my graduation got canceled this week. I am allowing myself to be disappointed but I am grateful that my graduation is the biggest change I have right now. Again, thank you for your posts – they are helping me (and many others) through this!
Thank you for this post, I just borrowed a lawn chair from my parents so I can sit in the backyard (I was #influenced lol). Personally I’m doing ok – I live alone which I normally love, but this is totally different. My boyfriend and I have been apart which has been stressful especially not knowing when this will end, so I try not to think about it. I’ve been taking it day by day I’ve tried have little things to look forward to everyday which have helped me so much (baking brownies, a new recipe, a Zoom call, a long run, a new cookbook). I ran in the rain yesterday which sounds crazy but it made me feel alive haha. The second week was SO hard but last week I felt I was in a better place of accepting yes, this is reality now, and I need to see it more as yes, it sucks I’m bored but it’s better to be bored now and safe and get through it on the other side.
Thanks Carly. Great post. This is how I feel too.
Thank you for this. It’s nice to have someone else on the ‘just be’ train. I have a friend that sends me a list of everything she has cleaned out and organized every morning. She does this before I even wake up. Talk about anxiety provoking. You know what, I am just enjoying this time. Things will still be there when it’s over.
I would be asking that friend to stop that, girl! If it’s anxiety provoking, tell her so. Ain’t nobody got time to for more unnecessary anxiety!
I belong to a women’s group and we started a 30 day plan. We email each other every few days to let people know how and what we are up to.
I read that one person has an older person in their neighborhood and she uses construction paper to let her neighbors how she is doing. Green is for doing okay, yellow she needs something and red for I need help. I thought that was a great idea to limit her exposure.
I enjoy reading your posts. Thanks
You put it in words perfectly for the sure, why not model. That is exactly what I have been doing, and it just feels like what I need. I think I am going to have a lot of ‘bad habits from quarantine’ to break after this, but if sleeping in, having an extra treat, and living in dudley stephens is what it takes to keep my mind away from the negative, then thats what I will do. I hope you and Mike (and the pups!) had a great weekend. Sending good vibes your way 🙂
Libby
Thanks for this post! It’s nice to hear others who are taking it one day at a time and being forgiving of themselves for not feeling 100% app the time. As for dry lips, I live in Utah and it is so dry here all the time!! My saving grace is Lush’s Honey Trap lip balm! It works so well, has a nice smell and lasts forever! Stay healthy, send you good vibes!
Totally agree with you on the opting out of virtual hangouts. It definitely is weird not knowing how to end a call, I think your method of setting a time is a great way to handle it! I certainly can relate to the feeling of not thinking you can turn “on” for them.
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I’ve been… okay. Similar to your “sure, why not” motto I’m constantly saying “be gentle with yourself”. One fun thing I’ve done to stay connected with my friends (particularly those who live alone) is start a movie club! On Wednesday nights a group of five of us cook the same think and watch a movie on Netflix at the same time. We’re rotating who choses the recipe and who chooses the movie. It’s something I really look forward to every week <3
Your content has been great during the quarantine – thank you! Isolating with my husband, toddler son, and pup. My husband has an essential job so he’s still going in to work, but I am WFH full-time and trying to take care of my son at the same time. It’s tough! I definitely have less time in quarantine than I do in regular life because I’m squeezing work into nontraditional hours when I’m not responsible for childcare. So not a lot of time for extra hobbies, but I’ve been taking walks in the beautiful weather, baking with my son, and reading before bed. I’ve also limited my news intake to once or twice a day, which has really helped with virus anxiety!
Thanks for being so real and holding this space. I’ve been following you for a long time and really appreciate the more personal content you’ve been doing lately. We also moved into a house from an apartment just a few months ago and it is SUCH a relief to be able to have more space, get outside, etc.
Really needed to read this today! I felt so guilty for skipping my yoga routine as of lately but to be honest I’m 7 months pregnant and things are hurting now. I find solace in cross-stitch, baking and spending time with my husband and our pup. It sucks some days but it is nice to be living a simpler life!
It was my birthday on Saturday (4/4) and it was nice to have so many zoom
Or FaceTime calls! I feel like I connected with more people.
My husband + kids made me a cake so I felt so celebrated. It was like renewed motivation. I did also order two new pajama sets. Have you seen the jcrew pair that’s gray with navy hearts?! So cute! Had to have them.
But before my birthday, I was feeling pretty blue. Everyone needs something to look forward to!
I’m not doing great right now. I tested positive for COVID-19 and haven’t been able to shake the shortness of breath. Quarantining has honestly been fine because I’ve had the mindset that I’m not leaving the apartment because I’m sick, but I think once I feel better it’ll really hit me. I’m supposed to be getting married in September and my FH and I have basically put a pause on planning because we don’t know if we’ll be able to have our wedding as planned. My June bachelorette party is definitely being postponed (once Airbnb extends its COVID cancellation policy at least). I know I should be thankful for the situation I’m in because I’m able to work from home, didn’t have to be hospitalized, have great health insurance that has covered my COVID bills in full thus far, and don’t have a spring wedding scheduled, but it’s hard to focus on the good when I feel so crappy. I’m trying to give myself grace to be a mess right now but I’m just exhausted, super emotional, and REALLY want to be healthy again so that I can get back to working out.
But I will say that a high point for me is reading your blog – this July will be 8 years for me since I started reading TCP every day! I really find your blog (content, tone, just everything) to be comforting right now. I know it must be hard to be working as an influencer when the world is shut down right now, but I’ve been loving your blog posts lately and hearing about how you’re dealing with it all.
I love your “Sure, why not?” motto. I’m an essential worker and I’m trying my best to keep my sanity through all this. I am an anxious person by nature and still have days where I can’t hold in the tears. This is all an emotional rollercoaster. I am really trying to soak in my days off. On a day off I try to be productive but balance it with moments of just resting and practicing self-care. I try not to be too hard on myself if I don’t get through all the laundry or dishes. Some things can wait right now. Being kind and good to myself is most important.
Your posts and Instagram stories have been, so, so helpful. It’s a weird time for everyone and I find that the reality of the situation is manifesting itself in different ways – no motivation to do household things, impossible to concentrate on a book, overall anxious feelings with no outlet. All of this is usually made worse when I see friends and influencers boasting about how this is the time to be the most productive / do things you never could do, etc. So, all that to say, thank you for being real! Your posts are the perfect balance of light content and reality, and I turn to them for advice and inspiration every day!
The photo for this post is just the laugh I needed! 😂 Carly, I appreciate you for ALWAYS keeping it real. Through good times and bad. Sending all the good vibes your way!