Just wanted to take the time to check in with you and see how you’re doing. So… hi! How are you? Holding up?
I think the reality of everything has settled in for me. I knew, logically, this was going to be months not weeks, but I guess it felt so “new” when it started. I lost a lot of steam and I’ve just been trying to give myself grace to not be my best. To not get a lot done even if I have a full day ahead of me. To skip workouts if I’m not feeling it. To choose reality TV over books. One of the things that helps me the most is to embrace what I’m feeling in the moment– if I’m sad, I’m sad and if I’m good, I’m good.
Thought I’d do a few light updates just for fun.
Here I am bundled up trying to get some good outdoor time in. It was so windy and cold but sunny so I made it happen with a puffer coat (on sale) and blanket (great small business!) PS Our new chairs (on sale!) came in about 48 hours– I was shocked!
Right before things got crazy, I started Invisalign. I was having this tooth issue and I panicked thinking I had gum disease. My other theory was that it was my permanent retainer which hadn’t felt right for a few months. But after a trip to the dentist, it was clear that it was, in fact, the retainer. So off it came. The orthodontist talked me into Invisalign. It wasn’t as expensive as I thought it was going to be and it wasn’t going to take as long as I thought either. I agreed, they popped the retainer out (it came out shockingly easily), and I immediately started the Invisalign trays. The first week was the worst. My teeth hurt so much. It was so uncomfortable that I regretted it and considered quitting. I’m switching my trays every Monday night so I was bracing myself for the second week’s tray thinking it would hurt as bad as the first set. Nope. It’s slightly uncomfortable but doesn’t hurt nearly to the degree as the first tray. I’m only four weeks in and I have already noticed a difference. Feeling good!
The biggest downside, besides the first week, is that my lips are ridiculously dry. Apparently it’s a common “side effect” of Invisalign. If that’s the worst of it though? Totally manageable.
Work has been… weird. I’m definitely grateful for the position I’m in all things considered. But it can be really hard to be your own boss at a time like this. (There are moments where I’m, like, I wish I had someone to just tell me what to do!) I’m trying my very best to do good. To put out content that is light but still appropriate for the climate the world is in right now.
My actual workload is about a fifth of what it usually is, which feels weird. I keep thinking I’m forgetting to do something or be somewhere. It’s a shift and I’m adjusting to it, even though some days are harder than others.
ZOOMS & VIRTUAL HANGOUTS
I’ve been turning down Zoom calls and virtual hangouts. I love the idea and sometimes it’s exactly what I need. Other times I just don’t feel like I can turn myself “on” for them. I read somewhere that was basically like even though you have an empty evening calendar, you can still opt of a hangout. And the best piece of advice I’ve found is to schedule an end time!!!! I’m still an introvert and I hate that awkward moment of being drained at the end of a call but not having anywhere to go. There’s no social cue for the end (like a waiter dropping the check off at your table) and no real obligation to go to next. So I’ve been doing the “Want to do a 30 minute Facetime at 5?” or “How about we do a Zoom from 6-7?” Maybe I sound like a loser but whatever. Virtual socializing is still socializing.
QUARANTINING WITH A PARTNER
Mike and I have been enjoying our time together, a lot. I was worried that we’d be losing our minds, particularly me because I really like my alone time (like silent/alone/please don’t talk to me at all time). But we have settled into a nice routine for Monday-Friday and then have a weekend routine, too. We both take time apart (grateful for this house), but we’re not driving each other insane whatsoever. Not that every moment is perfect– but we’re both giving each grace and recognize that these are not normal times and it’s okay if you’re not 100% yourself in a given moment. Mike and I are so very clearly on the same page for how we’re quarantining– it’s not even a conversation, we just both agree on what is right.
I will say I’ve been talking to various friends and one thing is clear… there are pros and cons to different kinds of living situations at the moment. There are times I’m sad we don’t have kids and times I’m relieved we don’t. Times when I’m super glad to be with my partner and other times when I just want to be in the house by myself. There are times when I would love to be in Florida with my family and times when I know I would probably lose my mind.
I kind of envisioned myself being super into organizing every bit of the house and I’m not even remotely interested. I did a couple of small things, like clean my car, and I’m cleaning the house and doing laundry. But organizing? Have zero desire. Which, whatever. I usually start to switch my closet over from cold weather to warm weather around this time and I have absolutely no interest in doing that.
I have been loving my needlepoint more and sewing the masks last week really inspired me to do more sewing projects. I talked about hobbies a couple of months ago and I stand by that. I’m not doing it to be productive (well the masks were) or to kick up some side hustle. I’m just doing it because I enjoy it, because it keeps my hands busy and eyes off screens, because it’s a nice mental distraction.
“SURE. WHY NOT?”
This has become my motto right now. I’ve been saying it left and right. Sleeping in? Sure, why not. Baking cookies before noon? Sure, why not. Sitting in my car in the driveway just to be in my own space for twenty minutes? Sure, why not. Ordering another pair of pajamas? Sure, why not. We’ve been saying that anything goes pretty much.