I need to be better at following my own advice. Remember my “happily ever as is” post? Well, I guess I’ve been applying it half-heartedly and not following through across the board.
The bottom line is that my life is pretty darn amazing and as perfect as I could ever imagine it. I have the best, cuddliest, snuggliest, muffin of a puppy. I have my absolute dream job. A wonderfully perfect family. I’m healthy, in love, happy, and passionate.
Since quitting my job to work for myself, I’ve actually been better about my perfectionism. Done is better than perfect, I remind myself four times a day (at least). When my income is on the line and I’m the only one responsible for it, I’m pretty good about getting things out the door even if I think it could have been better with a couple of hours of knit-picking.
And yet, I’ve been having this itching feeling of discontent. As opposed to when my perfectionism spanned my entire life (body, clothes, schoolwork, friends, relationships, crew, etc.), it’s been more focused on certain elements. To be honest, that in and of itself is a relief… but it’s still bothersome when I realized how unfair I was being about my life and not keeping things in perspective.
Notably, my apartment has been driving me insane. Truly insane. I think it’s because I’m spending way too much time here since I work from home, but either way it’s gotten out of hand. It’s not big enough or clean enough or decorated enough or light enough or organized enough. Every hour, I’m fixating on something about it and it’s been really bugging me. The irritation then spills over into my everyday life.
But remember all those things I listed above? All the things that are totally and completely happily ever as is? Gosh! I’m letting one small (totally irrational and trivial) thing get in my way.
Feeling content with where I am is so important to me– it’s a good place after all! Not only that, but this perfectionism thing can get in the way of feeling grateful. Which is even more important to me!!!
Instead of torturing myself more by scouring websites searching for apartments I’ll never rent online, and instead of wasting two hours mopping my floors every morning and every night, and instead of thinking of ways I can rearrange my furniture to make it feel bigger… I will be thankful that I have a roof over my head, and thankful that I have a job I love that I can afford it, and thankful that I have plenty of floorspace to play with my puppy indoors, and thankful that I can work from home and avoid that morning rush hour…
Feeling content and being grateful go hand in hand. It is, after all… all about happily ever as is
Has anyone else ever let one thing distract you from the good or distract you from keeping things in perspective and being grateful?

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I have to admit I do get distracting a knit pick at certain aspect or things that could be better or look better. The good always out weighs the bad, but sometimes it is really is to get stuck on something that is annoying at a certain moment in time. Lovely post!


Rachel Napolitano

Every single day. I am a textbook perfectionist, Type A, neurotic, whatever you may call it and every day I have the battle with myself to let go of it and simply be happy. I too am making the move to NYC in a few months and I just want everything to be so perfect that I'm pretty sure it's driven me certifiably insane but I just have to remember I'm lucky enough to have a job, a place to live, and be afforded the ability to have the experience when not many other people can say the same!

Keep your head up and your outlook positive!

"Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy"


This is a great post and I know the feeling completely! Sometimes it is really hard to tell ourselves that we just need to be happy, especially when we are living a great life, but nonetheless we just have to 🙂

Prep on a Budget


Sometimes taking our own advice is the absolute hardest thing to do! When I start to get down on things in my life that really aren't that bad I take a deep breath, absorb my surroundings and smile to myself. Then I remind myself that I'm HERE and to enjoy this very moment. Most of the time it snaps me back to a happy place 🙂

Kelsey M.

I know that feeling all too well. Nowadays I actively remind myself to acknowledge all the great things in my life, especially when I find myself agonizing over trivial things. It's all about staying present and grounded, which are both easier said than done sometimes!


For The Love of Fit

You should look into renting a coworking space! You rent a desk in a building with other start-ups or bloggers/entrepreneurs and you have an unofficial office to go to that's outside your apartment but not as busy as a coffee shop- best of both worlds.


Sometimes I get into a similar, frustrating place in my head where I'm deeply discouraged about something that is essentially nothing. It's hard to shake, but it usually just takes a stern self-talking-to and a friendly reminder that if I am breathing, this life is blessed. Cheers to tomorrow and a new day and a fresh batch of self-encouragement!

Jessica Joyce

You're so lucky to be able to work from home. I'd love to do that very soon, despite me just being in the midst of college. It's always been a dream of mine. For now since I do live at home, I think the only thing that's distracting is the thought that EVERYTHING EXCITING is going on outside and without me.

Your Friend, Jess


I'm reading this really great book right now called 1000 gifts and the whole point is to be more grateful – which I think in turn, makes you be more grateful and happy and content and just aware of all of the gifts in your life. It's a practice and something that I need to do more of as well.

Prim and Pauper

Hey Carly! I think you might really enjoy this book called The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. It struck a chord with me and might with you. It's a memoir written by a former lawyer turned author (aka super Type A person) who learns how to find happiness in her already "perfect" life.


I am so thankful for your honesty! This is something I'm currently dealing with, as I'm trying to be more grateful for what I have rather than wanting things to be my idea of "perfect". Perfection truly ruins the present! Thanks for writing this. I so appreciate and LOVE your blog!

Kim Topolewski

I swear it's like our minds are synced up. I've been feeling so discontent lately, sort of just with everything in general – life, work, my apartment, finances, relationships… you name it, I'm probably Ms. Grumpy Pants about it. Everytime I get in that mood or mindset I try to just keep reminding myself "Just because you have a bad day, doesn't mean you have a bad life".

It's so hard because we are blessed – blessed to be employed (by a company or self-employed), have a roof over our heads, food on the table (90% of the time at a restaurant 😉 hehe) and people that love us and are there for us. I totally get it.

carelessly graceful


This really spoke to me with a recent personal issue I've been dealing with, which is just as you said, irrational and pretty trivial. Your post could not have come at a better time. Thank you for helping me to take a step back in my day and take a look at all I have!! Keep your chin up Carly 🙂 and thanks for reminding us to do the same!


I love this! Yes! I am constantly making myself slow down and count all the things about my life that I LOVE!
Because we are perfectionists and over-achievers, these don't have to be negative things, we drive ourselves nuts to constantly strive for better!
Let's keep each other accountable with this. It's important to reflect on all the good that surrounds us.


Happiness, like all emotions are fleeting and I personally think it is unrealistic to expect to be happy all the time, or to aim not to be frustrated, that in itself can become another perfectionistic, over achieving goal that one can set themselves up for failure. It is OK to feel frustrated it is how you handle it I guess. I am not saying to wallow in the negativity but at the same time ride the waves as they come rather then fight them. It is easier to ride and wave out then fight it, trust me… fighting it can make you more exhausted. Anyway I will probably have people not get this post, but it has worked for me then anything else. I spent years trying to 'fix' myself become better at a,b, c and d only to realise I was so busy trying to 'improve' that I had lost the art of just enjoying life and myself at this present moment.


Carly, this may be the best post you've ever written! I read so many of your posts about being stressed and trying to fix things in your life and I think, "what is she talking about??" I mean, your job basically includes instagramming pictures of your dog!! You get free products and you live in NYC in a beautiful apartment- and you're only just getting into your mid-twenties! Your life is AMAZING. I know that there's things behind the scenes that make it really hard, which you often talk about, but really. It is. Trust me. 🙂


You look adorable in that photo! Great post, too! It's very easy to fixate on one (or a couple, or many) things that distract from what makes you happy. I wish that wasn't the case, but at least you have the wisdom to know that and work on it! I need to do the same! 🙂